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“I am relieved!”
In 1984 I came down with
chronic fatigue syndrome. I got a bad case of flu that wouldn’t go away and
had to spend a couple of months in bed, most of the day. My doctor would
prescribe antibiotics for my sore throat and each time I went off the
antibiotics, my throat would flare up worse than before. My sore throat
ended up lasting over ten years and I learned to live with it.
Acupuncture and homeopathy helped me to survive, but my recording career had
to be put on hold, though my album had gone into the top twenty on some
radio stations around the country. I am a pianist and my wrists were so
painful that I could no longer practice for any length of time. When I went
into the studio to record my album, I wasn’t able to practice because I had
to save my wrists for recording. One time, when I came home to unlock the
door to my house I could not hold the key to turn it in the lock. It was
devastating.
People in my life didn’t understand why I was ‘sick all the time’ and some
seemed to regard my inability to function as a reflection on my character,
so I tried to hide my illness; how bad I really felt and how hard it was to
make it to family gatherings, etc.
I gave up on my aspirations to be a concert artist, taught music part time
and gave occasional workshops as a music therapist. It was always a concern
whether I would be able to stand up on the day of the workshop. I found ways
to push myself and to pull together enough energy with meditation techniques
to keep myself going when I had to.
In 1990 I just collapsed. I realized, I was ‘on empty’. No amount of pushing
could make me able to keep going. I had been a pusher all of my life and now
there was nothing I could do to keep up my work, much less a social life. I
went to two naturopaths and was diagnosed with Epstein Barr virus and
Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. One naturopath and a renowned Chinese doctor both
said to me, “Your liver is shot”. The naturopath had a chart with a scale of
‘toxicity’ from good to bad and I rated in the second to last category;
“pre-cancerous, pre-death”.
I was told to cleanse my liver but every time I would take the cleansing
herbs, I became very ill, dizzy, unable to walk or stand up for days. I
became weary of everyone who knew that I was ill speculating about what was
wrong with me and whether or not I should just ‘push’ myself (impossible)
and get out and exercise more.
My health got worse, despite vitamins and herbs. By 1993, there were many
days when it was a struggle just to get out of bed and crawl to the
bathroom. There were times when I could not take more than two steps up
stairs.
There was an emotional component too; sometimes I could not keep from
crying. My body would cry in an upheaval and I would watch it happening. It
felt as though my insides were collapsing and dying, and gasping for life.
If it had not been for my husband, I felt I would have died as there was no
way I could take care of myself.
All of this went on while the people that I saw each week didn’t know
anything about it. I managed to be active for a few hours, two or three days
a week, just enough to keep up some of my music work. I found it best not to
talk about the fact that I was ill because it was not something that people
could understand. To say that I had ‘Chronic Fatigue Syndrome’ meant
nothing. Sometimes a person would respond with, “Oh, yeah, I have that too,”
but they didn’t have anything like what I had, because they could still
function.
I started going to Dr. Penniston in 1994. He was able to help me feel
somewhat better with the use of glandulars, magnesium, other minerals, fatty
acids, spinal adjustments, ‘tapping’ and meridian techniques. Eventually, my
thinking became clearer and I was able to spend time writing, doing research
and writing a book—something I’d never done before. I always tried to stay
optimistic but the truth is that it was difficult knowing that no matter
what I did, I still could not function and no one knew why.
Dr. Penniston tried everything. He tested every muscle in my body, I did
parasite cleanses, liver/gall bladder cleanses, hypoglycemia diet, candida
diet, blood type diet, took herbs for energy, herbs for insomnia. After a
couple of years, Dr. Penniston told me I should find another practitioner
because he couldn’t help me. The truth was, he was helping me more than any
other doctor, chiropractor or naturopath ever had. I felt a constant sense
of rightness about the work he did, always probing to get to the root of my
difficulty.
The big breakthrough came when Dr. Penniston and I found out about the
guaifenesin. I started on the guai in September 2000. It started working
immediately. My tiredness became more pronounced at first but, for the first
time, it didn’t feel horrible and frightening and disabling. It felt
healing. There was a new lightness, a sense that something in my body was
moving.
Within a month, I had big bursts of energy that I had not had in some ten
years. The next big change was that I could go shopping. Previously, I could
not go to a department store without getting a sore throat within 5-10
minutes from the chemicals in the clothing and perfumes on the people—and
then I would be exhausted when I got home. After eight months on the guai, I
could go shopping—for hours!—and not get sick. I was astonished. My stamina
began building.
My chemical sensitivity became remarkably less. I was surprised to find that
I could use hair mousse and hair spray. I could even withstand the fumes
from nail polish and polish remover, for the first time in my adult life. I
was able to use ammonia and bleach, something I’d not been able to do before
without getting sick.
I’ve been on the guai a year and a half. My energy is not consistent and I
still have some days where I can’t sit up or stand, but overall my quality
of life is better than it’s been in years. I’m not up to taking vigorous
hikes yet but I hope to regain my physical strength. The way it’s going, I
believe I will.
One of the biggest burdens has lifted and that is the psychological aspect.
I don’t feel like an anomaly, a hopeless case, an incorrigible individual,
anymore. I don’t have to wonder everyday of my life why I’m sick. I have
learned from Dr. St. Amand’s book the probable cause of my illness and that
it is inherited. My father has shown symptoms of FMS/CFS throughout his
life. My sister came down with it a few years after I did and had to quit
her work as a legal assistant—though her symptoms have been different from
mine. Just knowing why I’ve been sick and that there is a way to get better
has been the greatest thing, psychologically.
I am relieved! I am no longer condemned to a mysterious disease that nobody
knows how to treat. I don’t have to be concerned with people saying to me
“you don’t have to be sick if you don’t want to.” I don’t need to be
concerned with healers and practitioners, looking at me sideways,
admonishing me that my good bacteria must be too low, or I have emotional
issues with my parents, or my chakras must be misaligned.
I continue to feel better all the time! The guaifenesin is doing more for my
CFS than anything ever has. Thank God!
Sincerely,
Susan S.
Age 51
100 mg non-prescription guaifenesin 1½ years
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